jeffsoesbe (jeffsoesbe) wrote,

the long hard climb of the software defect load, and thoughts thereon

Well, I believe I have finally conquered the Undying Defect that has been haunting my existence for the last week solid and for parts of a couple weeks before that. I might even have uncovered an issue in the build environment too. It's nice to win one for once.

This Zombie Defect issue is only the latest in a string of work events that have really been grabbing more of my energy and my creativity. That, paired with playing more footy (Aussie Rules Football), doing a last couple math contest events in mid-May and start-of-June, and of course family, have left me in a perpetual state of "never enough time". And something that has been really suffering is the writing.

I've been in a serious lull. I haven't written anything new since mid-end-February, and haven't done any writing at all for at least two months. Maybe three. Even before that, I was becoming very dissatisfied with my writing because I didn't feel like I was anywhere near where I wanted to be with my writing. And, I didn't fell like I knew how to get there. And hadn't felt like I'd advanced at all in about the last year or more. Even though a lot had happened in my life in that year (no slack given, none asked for). So, in March, I basically stopped.

I've never thought of this lull as an "end stop", just a pause while I get other things (job, fitness, etc) into a more manageable state. The writing mind/voice has, for the most part, been okay with this and not protested too much. But I'm starting to feel it knocking around again, stretching its legs, reaching out, remembering how to form a story and perhaps even express it in half-coherent manner. It's even grabbing old stories and saying "hm, I think I know what to do with this one."

So we'll see how it goes from here. Time is still precious, I'm not out of the work crunch woods yet, but I can see some sort of light approaching in the distance. Writing still holds some meaning for me. What, I'm not so sure. But I guess the only way to find out is to do it and see where it leads me.

Real soon now. I hope. Real soon now.
Tags: life, writing

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